The Phone Call Daniel Didn’t Make
A few days ago, my son Daniel’s computer was hacked.
Within seconds, someone sent him screenshots of his own screen, along with passwords they had already pulled from his laptop. Then came the demand: send a $100 gift card to get his account back, or they would release his personal information to the public—the dark web, presumably.
Daniel, our second child, is the last person in our family you’d expect this to happen to. He’s the one we call when the Wi-Fi stops working or the printer won’t print. He studies engineering, and he knows enough about online scams to be the one warning the rest of us.
And that’s exactly why I want to tell you this story.
How it happened
Daniel spends a lot of time (or should I say live) on Discord, an online platform where gamers chat, hang out, and play together. Most of his friends are there, and many of them are engineering and computer science students.
And one day, he got a message from one of those friends. The friend said he had built an online game and asked if Daniel would try it and share his thoughts. It sounded completely legitimate. This friend really is an engineering student and a gamer, and making a game is exactly the kind of thing he would do.
Daniel is always ready to help a friend, so he said yes. He clicked the link, which took him to a page asking him to download a “pre-release” version of the game, and he did. That’s when the screenshots and the ransom demand popped up.
Of course, the message never came from his friend. An impostor had taken over his friend’s account and was using it to reach everyone on his friend list.
The good news
To his credit, Daniel moved fast. He reset the passwords for all his bank, school, email, and social media accounts, and then wiped his laptop clean with a factory reset. So far, there has been no suspicious activity in any of those accounts. He didn’t pay the ransom.
But he did lose his Discord account, and that’s when the scam came full circle. Soon after, his own friends started receiving the same message, this time from Daniel. The same trick that fooled him was now using his name and his friendships to reach the next person. His personal information may still end up in the wrong hands, so he’ll need to keep a close eye on his accounts for a while. But the damage was contained, and for that we’re grateful and relieved.
Why the smartest person fell for it
Since then, I’ve been thinking about why someone so careful would get caught. Daniel didn’t lack knowledge. If you had asked him the day before whether you should download files from a link a friend sends you, he would have given you a lesson.
Instead, four things lined up at once:
Where it came from. The message arrived in a community he trusts, among people he knows.
Who it came from. It came from a real friend, and the request matched exactly what that friend would plausibly do.
His kind heart. He wanted to help someone he cares about.
His curiosity. A new game made by a friend was something he genuinely wanted to see.
Any one of these on its own probably wouldn’t have been enough. Together, they made a nearly perfect trap. Each factor made the request feel more believable, and his confidence in his own judgment did the rest. And he skipped the one step that would have saved him: picking up the phone and asking his friend, “Did you really send this?”
“That would never work on me”
When we talked about it as a family, my daughter laughed and said a message like that would never fool her, because none of her friends make video games.
She’s right. But that’s exactly the point. Nobody would ever send her that message. A good scam isn’t one-size-fits-all. It’s built to fit the person receiving it, using the people, places, and interests that person already trusts. Her version wouldn’t be a video game. It would look like something her friends really do, and it would feel just as natural to her as Daniel’s did to him.
The “I know enough” blind spot
And here’s what I’ve come to believe. Overconfidence rarely comes from knowing too little. It comes from believing we already know enough.
When we feel that our understanding is complete, we stop checking. We don’t look for the missing piece of information, because we don’t think anything is missing. That’s the blind spot, and it tends to grow as our experience grows.
What this has to do with your money
Confidence is a good thing when it comes to investing. Research on investor behaviour suggests that confident investors tend to make decisions that fit their goals. They’re less likely to be swayed by advertising, the latest trend, or a neighbour’s hot tip. They stick with the plan.
But there’s a fine line between confidence and overconfidence. Confidence says, “I understand my plan and why I’m following it.” Overconfidence says, “I already know what’s going to happen next.” Very few people, professionals included, can consistently predict when markets will rise or fall, or which stock or sector will take off next.
Look at Daniel’s four factors again. They show up in money decisions all the time:
Where it came from: an investment idea from a trusted place, like an online forum, a WhatsApp group, or a financial show you’ve followed for years.
Who it came from: a tip from someone you respect, such as a successful friend, a relative, or an investment guru who predicted the 2008 financial crisis.
Wanting to help: being asked to invest in a friend’s or family member’s business, or to lend money to someone you care about.
Curiosity: an exciting new idea, like a hot sector or a new strategy, that you’d genuinely love to be part of.
Remember, too, how the scam reached Daniel’s friends now: through Daniel himself. Bad ideas travel the same way. The friend who passes along a hot tip usually isn’t trying to mislead you. More often, they believe it completely, because it came to them from someone they trusted too. Their sincerity is real, but it doesn’t make the idea sound.
Like my daughter, it’s easy to hear about someone else’s money mistake and think, “That would never work on me.” Often that’s true, because their opportunity wasn’t designed for you. The one that tests you will look different. It will come from people you trust and touch the things you care about. When several of these factors line up, a decision can feel obviously right. That’s exactly when it’s worth slowing down.
The blind spot can also shows up in a few common thinking habits:
Seeing only what agrees with us. We give extra weight to information that supports what we already believe, and brush off anything that doesn’t.
Focusing on what just happened. A recent jump or drop feels more important than the long-term picture.
Getting stuck on the first number. The first price or figure we hear becomes the measuring stick, even when better information comes along later.
Your version of the phone call
The lesson from Daniel’s story isn’t “trust no one” or “stop being curious.” Those are good qualities. The lesson is to build in one simple checking step before you act, especially when you feel sure.
Before a significant money decision, it can help to ask yourself:
Where did this idea come from, and could anyone benefit from my saying yes?
What would make this a bad idea? Have I honestly looked for that?
Am I reacting to something that just happened, or to my long-term plan?
Have I talked it over with someone who has no stake in the outcome?
That last question is your phone call. It might be a conversation with your spouse, a trusted friend, or me. The point isn’t that someone else knows better. The point is that a second set of eyes can spot the piece of information you didn’t know was missing.
Daniel learned this lesson the hard way, and he’s a little wiser for it now. I’m sharing his story, with his blessing, so you can learn it the easy way.
Warmly,
Vincent
The comments contained herein are a general discussion of certain issues intended as general information only and should not be relied upon as tax or legal advice. Please obtain independent professional advice, in the context of your particular circumstances. This newsletter was written, designed and produced by Vincent Lam, CFP®, Financial Planner with Intentional Retirement Planning and Investia Financial Services Inc., and does not necessarily reflect the opinion of Investia Financial Services Inc.
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